i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I could make wine with my vomit
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
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