i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?