You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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