She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
