Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.

  (1-561): View more from Florida

  Agreed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (561): If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet. (1-561): Agreed http://tfl.nu/8njb
  Replies (44) Good night (2901) Bad night (517)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I like you better when you drink

  (708): View more from Illinois

  I like you better when I drink too

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): I like you better when you drink (708): I like you better when I drink too http://tfl.nu/cvjp
  Replies (15) Good night (4532) Bad night (796)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  what is college for if not random hookup sex?

  (951): View more from California

  learning.

  (209): View more from California

  i would literally fuck learning if i could.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (209): what is college for if not random hookup sex? (951): learning. (209): i would literally fuck learning if i could. http://tfl.nu/3rtk
  Replies (50) Good night (9507) Bad night (837)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it http://tfl.nu/ub7i
  Replies (15) Good night (4266) Bad night (1148)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before http://tfl.nu/9107
  Replies (20) Good night (5254) Bad night (1169)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (715): Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel. http://tfl.nu/yi2m
  Replies (15) Good night (3219) Bad night (945)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles. http://tfl.nu/ov1n
  Replies (14) Good night (1309) Bad night (4513)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (774): just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked http://tfl.nu/dcyr
  Replies (7) Good night (2836) Bad night (656)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone" http://tfl.nu/ni9u
  Replies (16) Good night (1114) Bad night (3501)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed. http://tfl.nu/o1n2
  Replies (3) Good night (1688) Bad night (496)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world. (540): I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him. http://tfl.nu/0ulc
  Replies (6) Good night (644) Bad night (1594)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating. http://tfl.nu/dthl
  Replies (5) Good night (439) Bad night (1250)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled. http://tfl.nu/weru
  Replies (4) Good night (991) Bad night (378)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear. http://tfl.nu/e69q
  Replies (2) Good night (662) Bad night (339)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach. http://tfl.nu/d58b
  Replies (3) Good night (223) Bad night (560)

Randomize