i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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