I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize