My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
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