Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize