No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
