I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Randomize
