If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
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