i just google imaged poop.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
two words...techno handjob
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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