I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I smell like Dick and happiness
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
