the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
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