12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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