That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize