"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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