this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
