We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
