This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
