tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
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