I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
