First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Randomize