Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
