wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
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