we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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