whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
