Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Randomize
