just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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