Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Randomize
