I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
one two three fourrrrnication!
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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