there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
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