i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Randomize
