He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
