Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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