afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
