what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
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