Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
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They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
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speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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