Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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