My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
