some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
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