please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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