i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Randomize
