who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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