new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize