I like my sex mixed with concussions.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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