He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
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