I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
