is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize