I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
